You Look Like I Need a Drink

Some people say that it is important to not limit yourself when it comes to people you date. For example, his teeth might be a little crooked, he always wears campus crew hoodies, and Garth Brooks is his idol... but he's REALLY fucking NICE, and you two have LOTS to talk about, so you should just give him a chance. The chemistry will grow.
WRONG.
Ok, maybe it's right for some people, but it's not right for me. I know what kind of guys I'm attracted to. It's almost as if I have a mental list of things that need to be there, such as:
"alternative" style, a love for rock and roll, a fondness for alcohol, straight teeth, at least 5'11, an excellent comprehension of the conventions of the English language, and he has to be funny as hell. Some things get added and subtracted from this basic list, for example, right now it's necessary that the next guy I date has some kind of body modifications. Tattoos on the arms and stretched ear lobes add 20 points to his score.
I guess you could say I'm shallow, but am I? It's not like I'm looking for an Abercrombie model or anything. It's kind of fun this way, like a scavenger hunt. And it's not as if I'll turn down the perfect guy if he doesn't conform to my ideals. You can never be certain about your perfect guy until you find him.
What I am certain about though, is that when I meet someone, I know INSTANTLY if there's going to be chemistry. And if there's no chemistry right off the bat, then we've got nothing. I'm off to find that guy in the tight pants wearing a leather jacket, blasting the Descendants on his iPod.

Whatever I Want (Whatever that is)

I have a tendency of liking guys who are faintly aloof when it comes to expressing their emotions, which is strange considering I’m pretty much the opposite of that. In my last relationship, this was our biggest problem. (That, coupled with his inability to commit due to his infantile distaste for stability and responsibility.) So when that was over I decided that it would be really nice to be with someone who gave a shit and let me know he gave a shit. Someone who praised me for my awesomeness.

For quite a while I wondered if I wasn’t as awesome as I had thought. For a long time I was really self conscious and had low self esteem, and even now I have my off days. But for the most part, I think I’m awesome and I wondered why, unlike many of my friends, I’ve never had the super devoted dude. I had been warned by a friend, however, that in reality the situation is not as appealing as I had made it out to be.